Did you miss me?

By J.D. Hildebrand

Hey, do you remember me? For more than 15 years it was my distinctly odd privilege -- and always a pleasure -- to speak to you regularly.

Maybe we met during my stint at Computer Language, the Miller Freeman magazine that later became Software Development. I was there in the 1980s when object-oriented programming was still a branch of artificial intelligence and no one could predict whether C++ or Modula-2 would be the next hot language.

Or maybe our paths crossed when I was at Embedded Systems Programming or Unix Review, or even back in the Professional Computing or Portable Computer days.

Maybe you recall Windows Tech Journal, which I started at tiny Oakley Publishing Co. in Eugene, Oregon. We had some fun with that little magazine, remember? And we spun off VB Tech Journal and NT Developer and Component Builder...what a time we had!

In late 1997 we sold Windows Tech Journal and all the rest to a larger company that promised to invest in the magazines and take them to the next level. A year later the magazines were dead, the staff was laid off, and I was bound by a noncompete agreement that kept me out of software development and publishing for the next two years.

What would you do if the career you loved was ripped out of your heart?

One option: You could get bitter and depressed and let your misfortune occupy the center of your life. I tried that for a couple months. It was satisfying in an unproductive, self-indulgent way, I suppose.

Or you could accept the event as an opportunity, an invitation to explore other aspects of life. That's what I did, eventually.

I dug old musical scores out of the basement and fed them into my computer so I could hear them -- some for the first time. I undertook massive landscaping and gardening projects. I took my wife, Bobbi, to Paris and Mexico and Hong Kong and Bermuda and a dozen other places. We made a real vacation of it.

After a while, I even managed to convince myself that I didn't miss publishing at all. I couldn't recall why I'd once considered arcane points of the C++ standard important or interesting. All that was behind me.

Then Inprise's David I. called to tell me about an online community project he was working on. Would I be interested in helping?

And it all came back in a rush. My love of publishing, of bringing important ideas to a motivated audience. My dedication to best practices and powerful notions in software development. My sense of myself as a person with a place of service in this industry. I leapt at the chance to come back.

So here I am. I have some catching up to do. There's this language -- Mocha, is it? something like that -- that became important while I was away. New, impenetrable TLAs to decipher. I find that even my typing speed could use some work.

But in many ways, it feels that I never left. Scrutinizing manuscripts, working with authors, marching toward deadline...it all feels natural.

And when I stop to take a break, it all comes to me. The feelings I submerged while I traveled and noodled around in the garden. How I missed all of this. All of you.

The next time I write, I promise, I'll bring you ideas about programming and software tools and engineering methods and people and events. Rhetorical structures of glittering truth mounted on scaffolds of irresistible relevance. That's what Developer News is all about; that's what you have a right to expect.

But this once I decided to exercise an editor's privilege and say something as personal and heartfelt as anything I've ever uttered.

I missed you all so much. And it's great to be home.

An award-winning writer and editor, J.D. Hildebrand is the content director and editor-in-chief of Inprise's developer community.